If you are like me, when your husband went to prison your whole world came crashing down.
It is hard to get through every day; truly you miss him more every second. You are fighting the suffocating pain of your loss all the time. In the midst of this battle, it is easy to lose sight of the importance of friendship.
Friendship is an anchor in the storm of life. It keeps us rooted, sane, and focused on the important parts of life. Your pain and loss can keep you from building friendship and it can destroy friendships you have built. Your actions will determine how much support your friends will provide—and in particular how long they will support you. Investing in building a friendship is more important now than ever.
In order to build friendship, you must do these seven things.
- Spend time together. If you are not spending any time with your friends, you will begin to see your relationship grow cool and distant. If you want them close, then spend time with them.
- Ask questions. Don’t just talk about everything you are going through. That will get old and dull soon. Be intentional about asking them how they are doing and questions about their lives.
- Be nice. I know your life is falling apart and it may seem like your friends are just moving on without you—but they are not. Be kind to them and also let them see the friend you are to them. Practicing being nice will also help guard you against becoming bitter.
- Do something for them. Your friends are always going out of their way to help you, encourage you, or take care of your family—don’t let them have all the fun! Do something for them. You can cook a treat, invite them over, help with a project. Just do something to lend a hand to help them.
- Listen to them. Their problems might not seem as daunting as yours are right now, but they are still creating stress in their lives. Listen to what they are saying and then try to understand what they must be going through. Listening is a huge trust builder!
- Pray for each other. Pray for your friend’s needs and for them to also be blessed. When you pray for your friends, you take the focus off of your own troubles and think about the needs of others who are in your life.
- Be honest. The best friendships are between people who truly know each other and still walk through life together. There are plenty of people who won’t tell someone the truth—a friend is always honest. Share your feelings, opinions, and ideas freely with your friends. But remember to do it kindly and in love.
Friendships will help you make it thought this journey and become stronger as you make your way.
I am rooting for you!