When Ron went to prison, I was absolutely devastated.
And not just because I was now a socially single mother, but also because I was suddenly thrust into having to travel alone. And I am not talking about national travel, I am talking about driving. Probably no big deal for most people, and probably the last thing others even think about when they lose someone to prison. But, for me, it was a huge deal. I was definitely a terrified traveler and didn’t like to drive anywhere alone. I hated driving on the highway whether I was alone or with someone else. Always terrified I would get into an accident, or my car would break down, fearing I would get lost and never be seen again.
I do realize my fears were a bit extreme and somewhat irrational.
It didn’t matter; I was still terrified. I will never forget the first time I had to drive myself and our 2 sons to the prison to see Ron. It was just over 3 hours away, and more than 2 hours of that drive was on major highways. I wanted to throw up just thinking of being on the road for that long with my 2 little boys. I tossed and turned all night before the trip. As we started out the next morning, I was determined to make the drive down to the correction receiving center and back.
I decided I would not let my fear stop me from seeing Ron.
It was a brutal trip. With my hands gripping the steering wheel, my bald tires, and wheel bearings going out, I was the slowest car on the freeway. It didn’t matter to me that every other car was flying past me. I was doing it! I was driving on the freeway and not giving up! It was a serious breakthrough for me—and good thing, too. I had no idea at that time that I would be making thousands of trips to see Ron in prisons across the state for the next fifteen years. My experience with freeway driving grew rapidly, and with that experience my confidence multiplied.
That day I had a breakthrough.
Overcoming my fear of driving was just the beginning of my journey to overcoming so many challenges and facing so many of my fears. Did you catch that? It was the BEGINNING. Had I not been in the situation where my desire to see my family intact was greater than my fear of driving, I would never have ventured out and overcome that fear. And if I had not overcome that one, I am confident I would not have overcome so many other challenges in my life.
Change is hard, but change is inevitable. We either conquer and grow, or succumb and die to our potential. It is never easy to embrace change and face obstacles. It is, however, completely necessary if you want to reach your dreams. When others ask me how I overcame so much, I know exactly how to answer that question. For me, it wasn’t even about overcoming, it was all about saving my family. Anything that stood between me and that goal had to go!
As you look at your dreams and all the obstacles that stand between you and what you want, do you feel fearful and anxious? Is fear stopping you from walking out your dreams and living out your destiny? You will never make it if you focus on your fears.
Focus on your goal, be resolute, and you will conquer every challenge standing in your way – one victory at a time.
Cathy Tijerina
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